Music

"Nothing will ever replace drums, bass, guitar, badass vocals and a great song. Rock'n'Roll will never die 'cause Rock'n'Roll is a way of life."
(Brent Smith)


Threat To Survival – progressive, personal; rock music at its best

Three years have passed since Shinedown released their last studio record. Since the 18th September 2015, Threat To Survival is available worldwide – and is in no way inferior to its predecessor Amaryllis.
 

The new record is about development. Personal development. And it is about solidarity. The band’s solidarity is clearly perceptible and the development cannot be overseen. The record is homogenous but so much different from everything the band has done before; better.
Especially the focus on rhythm is striking, which can be found in every single song. With regard to content, the band has gone back all the way to their very beginning. The songs talk about finding one’s very own way and becoming the person you really are, about being brave and developing oneself, about being different. Still, the development of the band members is clearly visible here. They went through this development, they broke free from what held them back. The tone is more positive now, more motivating. Where there was “indecision” in Burning Bright from the first album Leave A Whisper, there is now place for clear words and clear sounds.
Threat To Survival has a noticeable own style which is seen through consequently, but the record is not at all monotonous. It is possibly the best record Shinedown released so far.
(09/02/16)


Asking For It – positive, rhythmical, wild


The new Shinedown record starts with a song that shows a similarly fast rhythm like Adrenaline of the predecessor record. But that is already the only similarity.

Asking For It has three constant rhythm changes which do not appear broken. The transitions are cleverly written so that the song never gets monotonous.

The topic of the song is typical for Shinedown and especially for Threat To Survival: Leave behind what holds you back and what is bad for you, do not let anyone treat you badly, do not let anyone make you weak, be stronger than the others. It is a critique of society, wrapped in an individual case example everyone has experienced once in their life. It is about leaving a former friend behind because they are not good for you and they treat their fellow men badly. Asking For It shows that it is always the people themselves that are responsible for what happens to them.

The fast rhythm and the positive melody also show some electric elements that are carried by the classical rock instruments. The song is rousing and it is fun at the same time.

Favorite line: “When all is said and done you need to tie your tongue ‘cause when you spit on everyone you are, you are, you know you’re asking for it.”
Listen to Shinedown's Asking For It here.
(09/02/16)


Cut The Cord – strong, heavy, powerful


The first single of the new record starts with a medieval melody and a children’s choir. “Freedom, lalalala” is also the motto of this song. Brent Smith gets into it with a loud and heavy “Cut it!” and brings the strong chords and drums with him.
All in all, the song is loud and heavy. It stays true to its line and almost yells about freedom which is its dominant theme. To break away from what is holding you, what caught you and shackles you, these are the ideas that hide inside “Cut the cord!”
Classical hard rock in contrast to light children’s voices – Cut The Cord plays with different singing. The background voices are coherently used and in the second stanza, an ensemble playing between Brent Smith and his band mates, who accompany his singing with their voices, comes into being.
The electric elements during the instrumental solos support the feeling of seeing glass burst which comes to life while listening to this song. The rather silent bridge is used to carry the chorus across even heavier. The melody is catchy, but moves in the background as the singing does not directly accompany it. Within the stanzas, it is rather similar to speech song where the rhythm is more important than the melody. However, not a single note is missed and the overall picture gets stuck in the head.

Favorite line: “’Cause agony brings no reward for one more hit and one last score. Don’t be a casualty. Cut the cord!”
Listen to Shinedown's Cut The Cord here.
(09/03/16) 


State Of My Head – symbolic, heavy on the drums, flowing


“State of my Head orientates itself towards the rhythm. It’s the first song I ever wrote on the drum line”, says Brent Smith in an interview.
What he means with this becomes clear right away. The notes are sung melodically, but they are mainly accompanied by the drums which are dominant and catchy. This creates the feeling of being in a melodic flow which takes one away. The song stays in the head.
The war analogy which is carried by the lyrics again plays with the desire of being free and at the same time standing up for oneself. The song plays on a battlefield where the soldiers face their destiny and fight for themselves and for their brothers, no matter the damage they take. “State of my head” has a double meaning here. On one hand the war metaphor suggests that it means the country of the head, the own psyche on which war is waged or which is defended. On the other hand, it could also mean the status of the head, which probably means the mind here. That way, a certain attitude is implicated.
Important is that this song is never about an I, it is always about a We. Transferred to the band, this shows their strong solidarity which was transformed into a catchy song.

Favorite line: “I'm not speaking under my breath ‘cause the harder you push the rougher I get.”
Listen to Shinedown's State of My Head here. 
(09/04/16) 


Outcast – powerful, full of energy, heavy on the bass


The fourth song of Threat To Survival is introduced by a heavy bass line. Brent Smith’s voice is deep which makes the song appear very impressive. The first two stanzas make use of the musical depth of all instruments. They are classically filled with rock instruments that show intensely how present rock music actually is.

In the chorus, the rather slow instrumental accompaniment changes to a clearly faster rhythm. Brent Smith’s voice creates a transition from the stanzas to the chorus where the pitch is higher. The notes are stretched longer. In comparison to that, they are even short and broken in the stanzas which is suitable and effective in the deep voice.

Most striking is the line “I’m just feeding my appetite”. It is actually a justification, but that is not how it is carried across. Instead, it seems the lyrical I does not care much about what others think of it. The song is about being the outcast of the outcasts and about being fine with that – “I’m coming back to outlast every outcast”. The motive is clear: stand up for yourself, be stronger than the others.

The strong line of the record remains clearly hearable. 

Favorite line: „And I’ve been swimming in the new millennium. Run, run, here I come. I’m just having some fun. I’m just feeding my appetite.”
Listen to Shinedown's Outcast here.
(09/05/16)


How Did You Love – melodic, profound, powerful-voiced


A piano leads the listener into the beginning of How Did You Love, together with the drums. The singing is more melodic than in the songs before. Brent Smith’s voice has a strong echo here. Again, the rhythm is a crucial stylistic device, also when it comes to forming the lyrics.

In the chorus, which gets introduced by a sung piece of art, the speed rises once more. The whole time one has the feeling of hearing something electrical in the singer’s voice.

The lyrics of How Did You Love deal rather indirectly with freedom this time, but there is much about the self and individual behavior in it. The song is about what a person leaves behind when their life is over. Therefore, personal development is in the focus of the lyrics.

The words “we are the judge and jury” are instrumentally underlined in the end of the song. There is an instrumental echo which reminds of a chapel. The words implicate that everyone has to undergo a judgment of the people surrounding them in their life. Eventually, it is important how one loved, which can also be a symbol for being a good person in life. One should try to stay true to oneself because there is only one chance and one self.

Favorite line: “How we forget ourselves, lose our way from the cradle to the grave. You can’t replicate or duplicate, gotta find your own way.”
Listen to Shinedown's How Did You Love here.
(09/06/16)  


It All Adds Up – heavy on the drums, electric, strong


The next song of the record makes the listener falter right at its beginning. Electric elements accompany heavy drums. Again, there is speech song within the stanzas – in a deep voice. Rhythm becomes the new guiding line. Only, this rhythm is characteristic.

It changes in the bridge. Still, the drums are dominant. In the last sentence of the bridge, Brent Smith ornately introduces the chorus by raising his voice.

Playful elements like the rattle of a rattlesnake matching the lyrics “calling all the snakes” liven up the song and at the same time make it more credible.

It All Adds Up means that all the bad things people do get added up. It seems as if the lyrical I has had enough. That way, the other people are described negatively, always followed by an “And it all adds up”, until it is enough.

Again, the topic is to stand up for oneself, but this time, the message is also to stand up for progress and for a better world. It is not only about being the way one wants to be, but also about seeing that one is better than the others by living this way. Those are far from what they thought they would be. The lyrical I gets invulnerable in this song.

Favorite line: “You’re a long, long way from where you thought you would be. Every murder has a motive but you ain’t killing me.”
Listen to Shinedown's It All Adds Up here.
(09/07/16) 


Oblivion – dark, mystic, surprising


Oblivion directly awakens associations with a mystic place, darkness and ancient rituals. The choir that accompanies the piano melody underlines this feeling and reminds of a choir from the musical Dance Of The Vampires.

The words of the first stanza and the chorus are whispered while the piano plays. The whole thing starts real slow until the stanza actually starts. Once more, the voice is very deep. The contrast to the chorus which comes to life by Brent Smith singing high notes very strongly supports the idea of breaking free from something; forcefully.

The lyrics are as mystic as the melody. “Behold the alchemy” and “spineless spirits” bring the listener directly into a dark ritual in which the lyrical I breaks free from someone who had hidden it in the shadows. The topic is well know: break free from what is poison for you, from what is dangerous for yourself. This person and the connected memories are sent into oblivion.

The transition from stanza to chorus happens in one single word, in which the singing voice changes within one long note. The chorus is sung fast and in high notes. The drum line in the bridge appears like the beat of a heart just before chaos breaks out. The electric guitar and the strong drums carry the whole song. Eric Bass on the piano towards the end of the song is cleverly chosen to keep it mystic.

Favorite line: “Rise, wrath of the rage. Those spineless spirits bleed, behold the alchemy.”
Listen to Shinedown's Oblivion here.
(09/08/09)


Dangerous – rousing, varied, motivating


Piano and percussions open the song that tells the story of being rather a threat than being threatened in the strongest and most obvious way. That way, it represents the record title Threat To Survival the best. The idea of being like the self demands it and that way also to stand against others, to develop all the time and not to be afraid of what comes next comes across so clearly here – and says what the record means: being a threat to survive.

The melody is flowing and rousing. Rhythm, like in the songs before, is used strongly here to carry the song. It is stylistic device number one here. Barry Kerch stresses the songs meaning with his drums.

Again, Brent Smith’s voice is rather deep but rises when it comes to the chorus. The suspense towards the chorus is introduced by rhythm changes so that it appears like an explosion at the end which is also supported by Zach Myers’ guitar much.

“I’d rather be dangerous” sings Brent Smith in the chorus and that way says that you have to be dangerous yourself and that you have to be threatening before others will keep you small. “Everybody is somebody and anybody is you. I own my story, I won’t say sorry – and neither should you.” – A direct request towards the listener to stand up for themselves, to be strong; to be dangerous. The line means that everybody is unique and – the way they are – does not have to justify to anyone.

The last “dangerous” is sung in a way so that it sounds dangerous itself.

Favorite line: “I will never be voiceless. My weapon of choice is I’d rather be dangerous.”
Listen to Shinedown's Dangerous here.
(09/09/16) 


Thick As Thieves – emotional, personal, depressing


Background singing and piano; that is how the most emotional song of Threat To Survival starts. The piano is joined by a bass drum and clapping, both very rhythmic. The words at the end of the stanzas get pulled up at the end which makes them appear more dramatic and the voice more desperate.

Within chorus, the drums get heavier and the guitar joins in and stays. In contrast to the previous songs the rhythm slows down in the chorus.

Brent Smith said on Twitter that Thick As Thieves was hard for him to write. It deals with acknowledgements of guilt which belong to personal development as well as being strong and being oneself. In the stanzas, each observation is introduced by an “evidently” which implicates that the lyrical I stresses the fact that its mistakes and the resulting behavior are on the one hand watched subjectively by it but are, on the other hand, obvious for everyone.

The song is about losing a beloved person. In the middle of the process, the lyrical I confesses to itself that it is his fault, so it tries to stop the separation from happening and to reach out to that beloved person. The song is about personal impressions and emotions. The grief is noticeable for the listener. Finally, there will be a solution. “We will still be thick as thieves” – we will always be inseparable.

Favorite line: “You built this fortress. I stumble towards it.”
Listen to Shinedown's Thick As Thieves here.
(09/10/16) 


Black Cadillac – energetic, melodic, positive


Following its sad predecessor, Black Cadillac is blooming positively. An electric keyboard instead of a piano at the beginning livens up the mood. For a change, there are no drums at the beginning; the join in later. Also in the song’s middle the band goes without drums from time to time, so they can come back strongly in the chorus. The rhythm is created by the melody. Moreover, background voices are used strongly which gives the song more volume.

All in all, the song spreads positive energy. “I got a mind full of inspiration and I ain’t living in the past no more” it says. The creative process can start or has started and supports the personal inspiration immensely.

Notes are left freely to have more effect. Breaks are allowed. The song seems relaxed and rousing at the same time. The singing is very melodic again and for a change not in a deep voice. It seems as if the personal development has happened within the record and after one has broken free from everything standing in the way, the time for art and inspiration has come; just one step away from happiness.

Favorite line: “I got a mind full of inspiration and I ain’t living in the past no more.”
Listen to Shinedown's Black Cadillac here.
(09/11/16)


Misfits – personal, calm, touching


The last song of Threat To Survival is completely calm. The personal development seems fulfilled. While Asking For It was still wild and impetuous, it is now clear who the lyrical I is and where it wants to go – as well as the record and the band.

Misfits starts with singing right away. The deep voice is also gone. The instruments form a carpet on which the voice is carried, but they are unobtrusive themselves. The I, the voice, is put in focus very clearly because the song is exactly about that.

Again, the motive is clear: you do not belong but others do not as well and together you can walk through life and be very happy. Here, a connection to the band members can be imaginable who went through a development together. While they stood together on a battlefield in the beginning of the record, this is now a promise to always stand together.

This feeling is underlined by the use of background voices that have an own part in the song where only the listener hears only them. Different voices are hearable; a strong collective spirit comes across.

In Misfits, too, the rhythm is somehow dominant, even though it is calmer than before. The development has come to an end for the moment and the result is satisfying for the band; and also for the listener.

Favorite line: “They called us crazy ‘cause we never fit in. We never bothered keeping up with their trends. It didn’t matter that we weren’t on the list ‘cause we were misfits.”
Listen to Shinedown's Misfits here.
(09/12/16)
Buy Threat To Survival here. 


How You Remind Me Of My Roots

On Friday, the 23rd of September 2016, I went to the NICKELBACK concert in Munich.

I've been looking forward to this day since I bought the ticket - knowing that it would cost me a three hour drive to get to Munich, even from the new city I live in. But I didn't care. I hadn't seen Nickelback for three years and I wanted to go back to rock with them no matter the price.

I was nervous for weeks because I wasn't sure if I could be there in time; I just started my new job two days before the show. But my boss promised to let me leave early the first day I came in to work. So I was even more looking forward to the concert.

And then the most incredible thing ever happened.
I knew the band was giving away VIP upgrades via Twitter for every show, so I waited for the call to post a photo of me with my ticket and the hashtag #NBMunich. 
Then I received this:

I never won anything in my life, but - I still don't know how - I got the Nickelback Twitter VIP riser. So I went to the show, even more excited (actually just a second away from a heart attack) to stand right next to the stage, only about thirty centimetres between the band an me. 
At all three Nickelback shows I've been to before, I've never been able to stand anywhere near the stage at all. And now I could even see the whole audience. 
When the band finally came up on stage to start the show with "Edge of a Revolution", they set the whole arena on fire. They sent me back to my very first rockshow, when I was 14 years old, back in Oberhausen, when I saw them for the very first time - as the first rock band ever live. Still I know this was the best decision ever because it was the beginning of what is my passion and love today. And Nickelback was that beginning as they were the first rock band I ever listened to; the first rock band that I ever saw live. Just because they were so incredible back then, I wanted to go to more rockshows.
The setlist was awesome: Edge of a Revolution, Something in your Mouth, Too Bad, Someday, How You Remind Me, Trying Not To Love You, Animals, Figured You Out, Far Away, Burn it to the Ground, Lullaby, Hero, When We Stand Together, Dirty Laundry, What Are You Waiting For, Gotta Be Somebody, Photograph, Rockstar (not in this order). 
But the show was even better.

 I never laughed so much at a rockshow!
Chad Kroeger just knows how to entertain people. He just takes that mic, starts to talk and it's hilarious. It's so different from the other rockshows I go to. Everything is just relaxed and funny, the music is amazing and even though they are so big and they fill this arena, you feel close to them. 
I love how all the bandmembers are included in the show, how all of them interact with each other and the audience. 
They did this beer-toss-thing they did before (where they actually throw beer into the audience, this time done by the support act: Monster Truck) and they had a Rockstar-Karaoke where they picked a guy from the audience to sing this song with them.
They also did a cover version of Foo Fighters' "Everlong", sung by guitarist Ryan Peake. That was basically one of my favorite things during the show because I really like the song and I was one of the only persons who knew all the lyrics. Chad saw that and sung to me (without a mic, he played the lead guitar during the song). Ryan did the whole song and he has an amazing voice.
We stood on the left side of the stage (if you're looking from the band's perspective), so on Mike Kroeger's side. It was just so sweet how much he cared for the two children who were with us. They were maybe seven years old and he always checked if they were ok, gave them shirts and his picks and looked at them during the whole show. 
The drummer, Daniel Adair, didn't play a solo this time. Still, it was clear enough how awesome he is. As he was the only one whose face I could see all the time, I could see that he looked at me during the show; at least I thought he did. I'm actually pretty sure he did because after they had finished, he came to me to give me his drumstick. Thank you so much for this again!
This whole night was just crazy and it reminded me of where I began with all the rockshows and the music and the love for these people and for what they do. Without Nickelback, I would've never even listened to Shinedown, so I would've never known Halestorm and all of the other bands. Without Nickelback, I would've never realized how amazingly touching a rockshow can be, how intensive it feels to be in the crowd, to hear your favorite songs live, to shout along. This rockshow brought me back to my roots. And I loved it.

 Thank you.

 (09/25/16)

Rock Goddess, Role Model, Sex Bomb - Lzzy F*ckin' Hale



It's not like there are no reasons to talk about Mz Hyde everyday, but I chose to do it today because it is her birthday.

Lzzy Hale, born 10th October 1983, aged 33 years today, is a heroine. 
 
Let's go back to the year 2012 when everything has begun. I first saw Halestorm as a special guest support at my first Shinedown concert. Until this day, they are the only supporting band ever I started to listen to after the concert. I have seen them live for eight times now (would have been nine, but they got canceled at Rock am Ring) and met them three times plus one time after a show. 



 Of course I gained much strength from Brent Smith at first, and I still do today as he is one of the best persons walking around on this earth. But Lzzy Hale means so much to me for different reasons. It is her being a woman, rocking a man-ruled world, dominating it with her incredible voice, being the queen of rock'n'roll, the Goddess of rock music. She is my role model because - yes - she is confident and strong at wears high heels all the time and is smokin' hot. But most of all, she openly talks about her way to the person she is today, which wasn't always easy, and she shares her experience with us so we can see that, yes, she is this rock Goddess today, but she had to work hard for being where she is now and that we can make it - whatever it is - because she could and she is on our side. 


 
Besides all her talents - singing, guitar, piano, writing lyrics, designing clothes, being a make up and health guide - she is just one hell of a person. She appreciates the love we give to her and the band, she is grateful, she is realistic about this world, and she would never let me down. She gave me strength when I needed it most, wrote songs straight from my soul, made me laugh when I didn't expect it at all and comforted me when I was upset. She taught me to believe in who I am and in who I want to be. Her confidence gave me hope when I thought there was no one out there who understood what I was feeling. She is living the rock'n'roll way of life Brent Smith is preaching, and she showed me that a woman can do this and be bad ass and just rock. So I told myself that I would be a little more like this, a little more like her - and it made me feel so much better, so much more like myself. 



 So, I just want to say THANKY YOU, LZZY! For everything. Everyone, wish her a bad ass birthday. She deserves the best you can give her and more. 



 Halestorm: Bad Girl's World.
(10/10/16)

The Man who Made My Year - Zach Myers



33 years old today - so born 7th November 1983 - Zach Myers is definitely the man of the year for me. His birthday is reason enough to say a few words about this person and what makes him a hero.

First of all, Zach is the guitarist of my favorite band of all time: Shinedown. He is overly talented. He has a good taste in clothes, especially shoes. He has the same hair growing rhythm like my brother. But most of all, he is just such a cool person - someone I definitely want to be friends with.



I saw Shinedown live this year - five times all in all. It was the first chance to see them again after four years of waiting. The first time was in London at the Carnival of Madness show, where Zach gave me one of his picks. Then I had to wait until June for Rock am Ring and three headline shows.

I made a sign for RaR, referring to the birth of Oliver Levon Myers, the endlessly beautiful son of Zach and his wife Bethany. Zach saw it and thankes me several times, and in the end he threw his wristband for me. Unfortunately, some other girl caught it from my hands. I wrote Zach what happened and told him I was coming to the show in Hamburg, and that was the start of our two-week-friendship.



Since then, I stood in front of Zach at all three headline shows: Hamburg, Amsterdam, Nijmegen. I finally met the guys in Amsterdam and had the sweetest talk with him. We wrote several messages and in Nijmegen, he came out only because I told him there were people waiting.

Zach Myers made this June amazing for me. I felt loved and cared about.



I find it great how active he is on social media, that he shares his private life with us and how politically interested he is. I also think it's good that he openly states his opinion, because people look up to him and they can see that politics are important when he talks about it.

I hope, Zach, if you read this, that we will meet again, talk again. Happy Birthday, Mr. Myers. And thank you for everything. No matter what others say, you will always be a hero.


(11/7/16)

Rock before Christmas #1 - Billy Talent burning Düsseldorf down


 

I've been to my last Billy Talent headline show in 2013 in Bochum and I actually did not like it. I do not know why, it was just the people, the choice of songs, the location. So I decided I would not necessarily go to another show. But when I saw the guys at Rock am Ring, they just killed it. They finished the whole festival for (which I hated so much because nothing worked out and I could not see two of the bands I came there for) and just touched me. They chose the best songs they could play.

It was hilarious.

So I bought a ticket for the show in Düsseldorf and went there with my brother and two close fans. We made it to the front and met two super kind people we spent the whole show with.

And so it began. Two supporting bands - The Dirty Nil and Monstertruck - opened up even though Billy Talent does not need a warm up. As soon as they hit the stage, everything's on fire. They opened with "Devil in a Midnight Mass" and the audience went crazy right away. It was pure fun and the setlist was gold.


Besides the big hits like "Fallen Leaves", "This is how it goes" and "Surrender", they also played some surprising stuff like "This Suffering" and "White Sparrows". And of course there were many songs from the new album; not just "Afraid of Heights" and "Louder Than The DJ", but also "The Crutch", "Ghost Ship of Cannibal Rats" and "Leave them all behind". However, I missed hearing "Diamond on a Landmine", which they played at every show I had been to before.
Lead singer Ben talked a lot about serious topics like Donald Trump, but also the sickness of their (former) drummer Aaron Solowoniuk who suffers from MS. Judging by the reaction of the audience, this is one of the points that a) belongs to every Billy Talent show and b) is deeply loved by the fans - because we like being talked to, being taken seriously.

In the end, there is not much left to say but this: I will definitely go to the next Billy Talent concert again. Pure fun, exhausting like hell, great choice of songs, awesome live music. Thank you.
(12/16/16)

Rock Before Christmas #2 - Alter Bridge convincing me forever


So after seeing Billy Talent I went to Frankfurt to rock out with Alter Bridge - for the very first time for me. I just discovered the band for me this year and to be honest, I regret all the years I didn't listen to them.

For the show, I didn't know what to expect. First there were two supporting bands, one of them Gojira, which isn't really my kind of music. But their show was good fun and they handled the lights not working nicely. The second band was Like A Storm and I really think they make some awesome music. (Never saw anyone playing a didgeredoo on stage before!)

So, back to Alter Bridge. First to say, they had a hilarious setlist! I really loved hearing "Broken Wings" and "Open Your Eyes" live as well as "Addicted To Pain" and "Isolation". And of course there were many amazing songs of the new album. 

Alter Bridge means awesome guitar solos live. That's what I learned, too. However, I would love it more if Myles Kennedy (who looks even more handsome live) would talk a little more to the audience. 

And there's nothing over a musician performing a song live and all alone at a rockshow. Thank you, Myles, for giving us your live version of "Watch Over You". My personal highlight of the show.


Myles also has a hilarious live-voice. And he's always smiling which just sends positive vibes all the time. One more thing to mention, it's been quite nice to also hear Mark Tremonti sing a song - "Water's Rising".
One thing's for sure now: If Alter Bridge comes back to Germany anytime soon, I will definitely go to a show! And next time, I'd love to go there with my dad (who went to the show in Cologne the day after the show in Frankfurt).
(12/30/16)

Mr. Brent Smith - The man who changed my life

Another birthday gives me a reason to talk about another important person - actually THE most important person for me.
Mr. Brent Smith
It's no secret that this man changed my whole life by showing me where I belong in this world. Brent opened my eyes for a world I was looking for so long. When he came up on that stage in Cologne on 5th February 2012 and started to talk about rock music and life and all of this being forever, I just saw it. 
This man is without any doubt a true hero. Brent Smith is overly talented. When he enters a stage, the whole room or stadium or whatever he's playing in will just listen to him. His voice gives me chills. He is super handsome, kind, gentle, funny and always surprising me.
I met Brent last year and it was the first time for four years that we talked again. It is amazing how much time he took just so we could have a conversation. And it is amazing how different he is off stage - but as adorable if you ask me. 
Brent Smith always finds the right words to say to get me through the tough times. He did once bring me through a phase of loneliness and despair, and I trust in him being able to save me again.
There's not much left to say but thank you. I hope that one day, we will have the chance for another conversation. Happy Birthday, Brent! You are beyond amazing.
(1/10/16)

Shinedown Rules Forever



It's been almost a year since I went to my last Shinedown show. And I didn't expect to see the guys this year because the headline tour in Europe I'm desperately waiting for is still not announced. However, the guys are around here with Iron Maiden right now, opening the shows for the legend.

I'm not into Maiden at all and the dates weren't set good for me at first, so I didn't get a ticket. But then I heard more dates had been added, and one was yesterday in Frankfurt, only a one-hour-drive from here. I had no ticket, but I spontaneously decided to simply drive to Frankfurt and see what'll happen.

Long story short, I bought a ticket for 80 € to see 45 minutes of Shinedown basically.

I know that's insane. I simply needed to see them. Desperately. I wasn't feeling good the last days due to leaving my family again and returning to Würzburg. I don't know what exactly, but it hit me hard. Shinedown is the only band that can always cheer me up and so I just went there.


When I entered the hall fifteen minutes late, they were just playing "How Did You Love" and I could barely hold back the tears. Not because of the song, but because of seeing these four guys. Because they made me so happy. And strong. It just felt like my other family was up on stage in front of me.

These 45 minutes I had with them were short, way too short, but they were perfect. Zach Myers, guitarist of the band, waved at me when he saw me and threw a drumstick and a pick for me (I didn't get thr stick, though). I'm still about to cry when I think back to these moments.

I know it's hard for these men to leave their families behind, too. That's why I felt even more connected to them. And I am beyond grateful for what they do to me without even knowing it. And I want to give something back, but I fear I don't have much to give but a few words on a blog nobody reads.

I only wish I could tell them in person what they, their music and everything they stand for mean to me. But maybe, one day. As we all know: It's never goodbye, it's just 'till next time.

(04/30/17)

This is my "Wake Up Call"



It’s been almost three weeks now since the new Theory of a Deadman record „Wake Up Call” was released. After the first single “Rx” came out, I was convinced this album would be awesome. Turned out I was right. Eleven artistic and amazing songs made my life easier, inspired me, touched me.

I will only talk about some songs here because I don’t want to be repetitive.

The first one I want to point out is the first song of the record, “Straight Jacket”. I loved it from the very first moment because of the impressive lyrics and the so different style. It’s always great to listen to a band developing and not producing the same album over and over again, like Zach Myers of Shinedown always says. Theory of a Deadman definitely developed with this record, and “Straight Jacket” makes it easy to hear. It focuses on rhythm, has a lot of poetic, poetry slam like lyrics. You just have to jam along.

“Rx” is another outstanding song. Firstly, the topic is so important and it’s quite brave to talk about it in public and to feed the fans with this song, this topic before they know anything else about the album. The atmosphere in this musical piece of art reflects life and it helped me through times of trouble.

My favorite song of “Wake Up Call” at the moment is “G.O.A.T.” – a play on words I had to get first, but then I loved it. I like the way you can listen to it ironically as well as taking it seriously and still get the message I think it conveys: that we all work hard and none of us is perfect as we are all human beings, but still we try and have this dream about being more than human somehow.

One more song: “Loner”. This is the one song I’m most thankful for as it is so important for people to listen and understand this. I’m not sure if any of the and members would be defined a “loner” but it doesn’t matter as the song only says: it’s okay. Be whatever you want. You don’t have to live up to everything society expects, and we all should watch ourselves a little more closely, care a little more, listen a little more carefully. I feel like I’m in this exact position right now, in the process of understanding this and this song came to me just in time.

So that’s just four of eleven great songs. I recommend: Buy the whole record, listen to it as a whole. It tells a story; about the band and the way these guys have come, but also about yourself. It is a very emotional record and you really should give it a try.

Here’s a song to start with: "Rx" by Theory of a Deadman
(11/15/17)

The DEVIL’s in the next room


It’s been awhile since Shinedown released some new music and when they did, it came in with a bang. Now they released the first single of the new album “ATTENTION! ATTENTION!” which will be released on 4th May 2018.

“DEVIL” is a hell of a rock song!

It came out together with the official music video which is really intense. Both are crazy, heavy, and very new to us Shinedown fans regarding to style. But new does mean more amazing here. The progress this band always makes with every single piece of music they create is fantastic. It’s inspiring. It’s breathtaking.

„DEVIL“ is very rhythmic. It’s heavy, a great rock song with crazy guitar riffs. Brent Smith puts all his power in his voice in this song. This is a piece of music that gets stuck in the head right away and won’t leave too soon. The words are somehow dark, but also powerful. The rhythm is catchy. It is a song even more powerful than “Cut the Cord” was, but with its very own dynamic and its very new Shinedown style.

If you take a closer look at the lyrics of "Devil", it is promising an extraordinary album with an amazing concept. "It’s about to get heavy" is the first line of the chorus and at the same time it might also be the motto of “ATTENTION! ATTENTION!” Brent Smith also starts the song with the words “Pick it up, pick it up, pick it up, pick up the phone!” – For me, he asks the fans to listen to the new song, to be ready to take this new album and love it. And in the end, why shouldn’t the record be the devil waiting in the next room?
  
But I’ve already talked to much about a piece of art that no words can ever properly describe. So I suggest you give it a listen:

(03/13/18)

One step at a time - thank you for everything!


I'm sitting at home and I wonder. I wonder how these three days could pass so quickly. And I already miss everything. I miss it when the lights go down and Barry, Josh, Eric and Brent come on stage. I miss the jumping and singing and screaming. I miss the crying when Brent starts to talk right before they play "Brilliant". I miss crying during "Brilliant" and not having recovered during "Second Chance". I miss Barry going nuts during the show. I miss Stefanie next to me, crying and laughing with me. I miss all of this. I miss Shinedown.

 But back to the start. There were these three cities and these three Shinedown shows I went to: Groningen, Amsterdam, and the Graspop Metal Meeting in Dessel, Belgium. I had been to Rock im Park already, but that felt so long ago. And it was just not the same.

 06/20/18, Groningen, Netherlands
The show was on. My first Shinedown headline show since June 2016. My first Shinedown headline show without Zach Myers, but thank God there was Josh Sturm who was just as awesome and who did this whole tour with Shinedown so Zach could be with his family when his second son, Avery, was born. Stefanie and I went crazy as soon as "Sound of Madness" started. And we didn't stop until the very end of it all. In the middle of the show, Brent started to talk and his first sentence of this speech was: "When was the last time someone called you wonderful?" That was when the tears started to come and they wouldn't stop until after "Second Chance". Crazy. I thought this was the most emotional Shinedown show I've ever been to. It was at that point.

 When it was all over, I went outside and Stef went to her hostel. I drove around in my car, somehow lost. We didn't know where the bus was and so we didn't think we would see the band after the show. But then there was the tour bus and I was all alone standing there until one of the crew, Matt, told me that they'd be there in a minute. And then all of them, Eric, Josh, Barry and Brent, came out to talk to me and that was just the most amazing thing. I can openly say that I have never been happier in my whole life. 

 06/21/2018, Amsterdam, Netherlands
Sold out show. Stefanie and me in the front row again. And then things got even more emotional than the day before. Brent introduced "Brilliant" again and I don't know if on purpose, but he talked about so many things I had written down in the letter I had given to him the day before. No words for how I felt. That was just beautiful. Overwhelming. 

 We met the band afterwards again and they knew they wouldn't get much sleep before the next show in Belgium, but still they took their time to talk to us. So many kind words, so much love. 

 06/22/2018, Dessel, Belgium
The Graspop Metal Meeting. I was still emotional from the day before and I didn't expect to be even close to front row because I was very late. But thanks to the most amazing person, Andy, who let me stand in front of him in the front row, I could enjoy that view one more time for this summer. The set was short, only 45 minutes, but even though they must have been tired as hell, Shinedown gave it all. 


 At the signing afterwards so many people came, they couldn't finish during their 30-minute-time-slot. So Eric and Barry decided to walk straight into the queue and talk to those who couldn't get to them anymore. 

 This is the shortest version of the story I could think of. There's so much more to say. And the following will be directly for these four guys that made these last three days so very special. But if you like, feel free to read on. 

Dear Barry,
Thank you so much for smiling at me during the shows. For giving me your drumsticks in the end. For talking to me afterwards. My brother was super happy about your voice mail and he definitely will be there in November to see you live again. You are such a kind and gentle person and I know this wouldn't have been as funny and crazy without you. You make people smile by being yourself. You are amazing.

Dear Josh,
You did such a great job on those guitars. Your energy and presence on stage were perfect and I am very happy and grateful that I got to know you. Thank you for making all this possible. Thank you for coming out and talking to me. You will always be a part of the Shinedown family and I hope we can meet again some day. You are amazing.

 Dear Eric,
There are no words strong enough to describe how deep my respect for you is, for what you do up on stage every night. Thank you for talking to me after the shows and for making me laugh. You are not only overly talented in almost everything but also very funny and just such a good person. You help people get through their tough times and that is so important. You are amazing.

 Dear Brent,
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. For the advice you gave me in Groningen, for listening, for sharing your thoughts with me. I feel so very privileged because you spent so much of your precious time dealing with my issues and sharing parts of yours. And I really mean what I wrote in my letter: If there's anything - anything - I can do to give some of this back, to do at least a tiny part of what you did for me for you, please let me know. I'm sorry for crying in Amsterdam, I didn't want to be strange. You made me happy and you made me feel better. You are amazing.



 I am happy and grateful that I could do these shows with you. And I will see you again in November. Be safe and have a safe travel home. 
(06/23/18)

'Cause I'm a freak like them


 

On the 15th October 2018 I’ve been to my 10th Halestorm rockshow. And I am deeply in love with this band, even more than before.


I saw the girl and three guys rock out twice this year, one time in Tilburg and then my last show so far in Cologne. Tilburg was great, especially as I hadn’t seen the band for almost three years. They played many new songs and I could rock out with the band and the fans just the way I like it. Afterwards, we waited at the bus and all I can say is: Halestorm are so sweet! 



Joe Hottinger, guitarist and awesome dude, just walked up to me and gave me a tight hug. We talked for a while and he gave me one of his guitar picks because I am unable to catch them at shows. And bassist Josh Smith, too, remembered me after almost three years which honestly felt so good. Lzzy Hale, singer of the band, gave compliments to my friend and me for her lipstick and my hair and we could talk for a while, too. And Arejay Hale, the drummer and little brother of Lzzy, was just funny as always, making everybody laugh. And this is just the short version of how amazing and sweet this was and of how good all four of them made me feel that night. 



Then my 10th show in Cologne. All I can say is: This might have been the best Halestorm show I’ve been to so far. The setlist was just amazing, the atmosphere was so wonderful and the band had this energy on stage, everyone just had to have fun. I never had so much stage-audience(me)-interaction at any rock show ever – with every single band member. And their photographer Judy Won was just as sweet and took pictures of me singing and holding up the sign I brought, but she also took my camera and took photos of Lzzy and Joe playing “The Silence” from right in front of them. 
After the show, Arejay, Joe and Josh came out to us and I just have to say this again: I think I fell in love. Joe was just so sweet and kind and we talked a lot and I got hugged a lot. The same is true for Josh who also sent a voice mail to my brother (he couldn’t come even though he had a ticket because the main station in Cologne was shut down completely). 


So that was my experience. But I want to say more about the band. To the band.


Arejay Hale: Thank you for being this funny person you are. You make me laugh when I need it most, no matter if you’re up on stage or hanging with the fans after the show. Your positivity is amazing and more people should be like you. You are overwhelmingly talented as a drummer and it is a pleasure to watch you do your thing up on stage.




Joe Hottinger: Thank you for everything you did at those two shows. You made me feel very loved and appreciated, you made me smile and I cannot thank you enough. I hope that you, too, feel as appreciated and loved (by me) as you deserve it. You are an amazing person and musician and the world needs more people like you. I am just so happy I got to know you, Joe. You lifted me up without even knowing how much I needed that and this is just great. You are just great. 




Josh Smith: Thank you for you, basically. Thank you for remembering me. Thank you for making me smile. You are such a kind and gentle and funny and sweet person and I am happy I got to know you. Your energy on stage is amazing and I love watching you play your music. You, too, lifted me up during those two shows without knowing what that meant to me in this time and I am so thankful for this. I hope the letter could explain what all this means to me and I hope you feel as appreciated and loved (by me) as you deserve to. Thank you, Josh. 



Lzzy Hale: Thank you for making me strong with your music and you kindness. You are amazingly talented as a musician and the way you lift others up and share your love is inspiring. You are inspiring. I hope my letter already explained what you did for me and what you do for others. Just never ever change, you are gorgeous. I hope you know that. I hope you feel as appreciated and loved as you deserve to. Thank you for everything.
(10/18/18) 

Shinedown Roadtrip: Manchester



Kilometers traveled: 2.680

Shows: 1/10

The last Shinedown show I've been to was in June, only four months ago. Still it felt like years. But now the Shinedown Roadtrip is really on and it couldn't have started in any better way.





I first traveled to Hamburg to meet my dear friend and Shinedown-travel-partner Stef, then we headed to Manchester for the first show on this run for us. The concert happened to be on Halloween, so we were super excited for what might happen then.


First of all, Manchester is such a beautiful city. I had never been there before and I really loved it. It has some beautiful architecture and many small and lovely cafés and restaurants. 

The venue for the Shinedown show was the Manchester Academy. We were there quite early, but soon enough other Shinedown fans arrived. 


For our first show we bought a meet and greet with the band - before the show. I had never been to such an official Shinedown meet and greet before and wasn't quite sure what I should expect. Well, it was amazing. The band took their time to talk to everyone, sign whatever the people had brought and just appreciate every single fan that came there. It was good to talk to them again (even though, for a second, I feared Brent wouldn't recognize me - but fortunately he did, on which he commented "oh shit" and then hugged me). Then they took photos with everyone and if people had more or less crazy ideas for their picture (for example that everyone should sit down) Barry, Brent, Eric and Zach just did it. So, yes, the meet and greet is expensive, but I think it was worth the money. 

And the show was fantastic.

I know I'm not objective when it comes to this, but I think you could ask whoever you want and they would all say the same thing: Shinedown live is simply perfect. 

photo: Matt Healy
The guys entered the stage full of energy and started with three heavier songs. Still, Brent Smith took his time to get down from stage and greet some of the fans there. And even if they slow down a little and put on a ballad, Shinedown never give less than 120 %. 


As it was Manchester, Stef and I had hoped to hear the Oasis cover which then really happened: Zach Myers sang "Don't look back in Anger" with the crowd. And it was fantastic. This song is really important to me because it helped me through the year I was away from home. My best friend and I even got the lyrics tattoed. And funny enough, I only started to listen to this song due to Zach playing it in Hamburg and Nijmegen 2016. Also, the Halloween spirit came across when Barry Kerch walked on stage with a goat mask on during "Simple Man". So this show had it all: emotions, fun, energy, power and so much talent all in one band. 


Halloween after the show.

For me personally, this first show of this Roadtrip was just everything I needed. It was so good to see all these wonderful people again: Stef, the Shinedown crew, especially Matt & John, and of course Zach, Eric, Brent and Barry. If I could I would be around them more often as they are all so very kind, funny; just good people. 



Now London's next. I'm really looking forward to that. And it has only just begun.
(11/03/18)

Shinedown Roadtrip: London



Kilometers traveled: 3.904

Shows: 2/10

London has always been one of my favorite cities and I've been there every year since 2012. My first concert ever in a foreign country was Shinedown in London, in the same venue they played this time. It was also Zach's birthday, so pretty much everything about this second show was special to me.

We waited almost all day in front of the venue because we wanted to make it to the front and didn't have meet & greet this time. So, yes, eight hours at the o2 Academy Brixton for us. Fortunately enough, there were some amazing people waiting with Stef and me.

Due to Shinedown I met so many beautiful and lovely people. Stef, of course. But also Lara, Stine, Sissel and Debs. And those are only the ones I know from the London show. Others that I'd love to mention are Rike, Em, Rita and Gabrielle. All these Shinedown fans I got to know during the years are super kind and lovely and spending time with them makes me really happy. It is simply beautiful how there is never a jealous word to be heard between these people and how we can just be good friends because of the music that connects us. 

The show in London had me emotionally all over the place. First of all, the venue let about 100 people in before us only because they had a certain mobile phone provider (which had not been checked, by the way). So Stef and I ended up in the second row behind some really nice people. Unfortunately, the people behind us were drunk and out of control, so during the show Stef and I both got hurt quite badly. To get this clear, I totally understand that sometimes you accidently hit someone because you're having a good time. Most people realize that, say sorry and help you up then. That's okay. But those people were drunk and/or on drugs and they shouldn't have been there like this.  


Shinedown still killed it! They played an amazing show and managed to make us happy anyways. When the whole venue sang happy birthday for Zach, he got really emotional on stage which I think was absolutely beautiful. Then he and Eric played "Don't look back in Anger" again. 

So, to take all the positive aspects of this day and show, I want to thank the amazing people that hung out with us before, at and after the show. I want to thank Barry, Brent, Eric and Zach for making everything better. I want to thank Matt and John for taking care of us. And I want to thank Stef for being herself and for being such a wonderful friend.
(11/10/18) 

Shinedown Roadtrip: Cologne


Kilometers traveled: 4.050

Shows: 3/10

The third show on our Shinedown Roadtrip was in Cologne, the one closest to my hometown. We got there quite early and experienced to full extent what it means to spend time in Cologne on 11/11 - the day they start celebrating Carnival (just FYI a crazy cat lady threw a plush cat at me). 

We saw Shinedown playing in the Live Music Hall, the venue where I got to see them for the very first time more than six years ago. Stef and I both brought some friends for this show, so there was the seven of us.

As this was the first show in mainland Europe for us, I was excited how the crowd would be different. And what can I say: This was the best Shinedown show I've seen on this tour so far. 

I want to focus a little more on the support band on this run: Press to Meco.


These three guys really made the crowd move in Cologne. I believe it's not easy if people don't know you and are actually rather annoyed because they want to see the other bands. But Press to Meco put on their show night after night and it's actually really a fun show if you move and let it move you. (That means, please, don't just stand still like a rock when the support band comes out. They deserve your respect and they deserve the chance to move you.)

Also, these guys are just super nice and their music makes a good warm up for the following bands. In Cologne, the people actually gave them the chance to get the crowd moving and it was hilarious. People were having so much fun and it seemed as if Press to Meco did, too.

The energy of the whole evening was amazing. Shinedown, too, put up one hell of a show again. The atmosphere was simply stunning as everyone really felt it and the stage-crowd-interaction was awesome I think. Everything was so positive, not even "Through the Ghost" could make us cry that night (even though it was incredibly beautiful). 

Cologne was the first show of three in a row and it was a really good start. Then we went on to Tilburg.
(11/15/18) 

Shinedown Roadtrip: Tilburg



Kilometers traveled: 4.426

Shows: 4/10

For our fourth Shinedown show on this roadtrip we drove to Tilburg, Netherlands. I had been there before to see Halestorm in October and the experience when we left the car and walked to the venue was the same again: We almost got run over by multiple bycicles. 



But eventually, we made it to 013 Poppodium. 

Now, before I go on, I have to say something about a certain person with quite amazing hair and a really good heart: Matt Healy made every single show of this trip funnier and better than it already was. And even though he is wrong about all cats being evil, this whole thing wouldn't have been as amazing without him. We're only halfway through but I thought it's time to say thank you: Thank you, Matt, for taking care of us, for making us laugh, for taking ridiculous pictures and videos of us, for all the other things you do - for everything basically. We love you. 


This show in Tilburg was super emotional for me. Shinedown played several songs that remind me of rather dark times, of certain people, of myself and the struggles I went through. Songs like "The Crow and the Butterfly", "Unity", but most of all "Call Me". Stef and I couldn't even sing along because we were crying. The thing is, these tears are okay for me because I know where they come from. And even though I might not always be alright, the music and Shinedown taught me to move on. But sometimes, it's just a mood I'm in and when a certain song hits me I just can't help it. That's just how it is. One step at a time.

I also want to mention how incredibly sweet Brent Smith was at this show. He seemed super worried because of us crying and made sure we're okay. Thank you for that.

I love these guys. I love Stef. I love Matt. Thank you for everything.  
(11/16/18) 

Shinedown Roadtrip: Frankfurt




Kilometers traveled: 4.782


Shows: 5/10

I can't believe we're already halfway through this roadtrip. It feels unreal and I don't want this to end.

 

Frankfurt was an amazing show. I had one of my closest friends with me, the gorgeous Carolin from Würzburg, and it was our first concert together. It was also her very first Shinedown show ever. And it was the first time for months that we saw each other which was just really important. 


So we went into the show. 

I already said something about Press to Meco and how cool they are. Now let me focus a little more on the "Special Guest" part of the show: Starset.

When the tour was announced, Stef told me to listen to Starset before the first show. She's a fan of that band, too, and I totally understand why. Their music convinced me the first time I heard "Carnivore". But what I didn't know was just how incredible their live shows are. They go up on stage in space suits, they have so much gear, they are seven people on stage. It's insane. And the music is even better when they play it live. During this whole tour, I'm not only looking forward to seeing Shinedown, I also really celebrate the Starset set. It's amazing. This band really won some new fans as my friends who came to some shows and I will most definitely go to the next Starset tour to see them as headliner. 


In Frankfurt, Shinedown played "Misfits" accoustic which was beautiful. Carolin, too, was convinced of that band (and had a really nice talk with Matt and Zach after the show - guess she will now and forever be introduced as my bodyguard). Her favorite song is "Brilliant", so the ending of the show gave her the high she definitely deserved. And, after three attempts that failed, I finally got a wristband from Zach (thanks for trying to give it to me so many times). 

Now that half of the Shinedown Roadtrip is over, all I can say is: I am so overly happy that we are doing this and I would definitely do it again. This band is worth every cent, every second of waiting in the cold, every missed meal and missing hour of sleep. I love these people so much.
(11/17/18)

Shinedown Roadtrip: Antwerp


Photo: Sanjay Parikh
Kilometers traveled: 5.260

Shows: 6/10

I never thought I could love Shinedown even more, but with every show I go to my love for these people grows. 

The show in Antwerp was simply beautiful. Stef and I had a little down phase after the Frankfurt show, so Antwerp was meant to be even more important to us. And it was just so very beautiful. 

Photo: Sanjay Parikh
It actually started out quite strange because people that mean a lot to us were not having the best day ever. I still want to hug Matt for several reasons. So Stef and I were a little worried about what to expect that night.

Cliff, a really cool guy who came to see Starset and did the Starset meet and greet, kept us a spot in the front row. Thanks again, that was awesome! 

Photo: Sanjay Parikh
That night, Shinedown played "Amaryllis" accoustic. As some of you might now, this song is really important to me. I got its lyrics tattoed and I even wrote a book about the album. So it meant the world to me to hear it live again after so many years. 

After the show, we met the band at the bus and talking to them was just really good. Also, Matt gives the best hugs I must say. Right now I am just so happy and filled with love for all these people, for everyone in Shinedown and Crew, everyone in Starset and their crew and for Press to Meco of course. This whole experience is amazing and I don't know how to get through the next days without seeing all these people. 

Thank you so much to the overly talented Sanjay Parikh for the amazing pictures you took of us. You are the best!

(11/20/18)

Shinedown Roadtrip: Stuttgart



Kilometers traveled: 5.893

Shows: 7/10 

I spent one week at home before traveling to Stuttgart for the next Shinedown show. That time was strange and I didn't really get to rest at all. But then, finally, the roadtrip could go on.


I arrived in Stuttgart before my dear friend Stef. When I met Zach at the bus we talked for a while and before he went inside again he asked me where my "other half" was. So, yes, you only get the two of us together at Shinedown shows.


In Stuttgart, I met the lovely Dana Elliot for the first time ever in person. And I love this woman! She's hilarious and overly kind and caring. I am so happy we could be at two shows together. I also got to know the amazing Melle, one of Stef's friends. She's just awesome and so very empowering and supporting. The world would be a better place if more people were like her. 


And let's just say: I love Shinedown even more for this day.

At the meet and greet, we decided to take a funny picture. Again, Stef had the best idea ever. The three of us went up to the band and she went: "Show us your best fighting pose." The picture is legendary. Zach and I had basically the exact same idea, Barry is just way too cool in this, Eric went full Popeye and Brent did the Crane "full extend". We definitely had the best time. 

Also, talking "The Room" with Zach and Brent was definitely amazing. (If you don't know it, it's considered the worst movie ever made and it's terrible, but also quite funny.)

The show had some strange moments. One girl insulted Melle because she didn't react to being hit by said girl from behind. Stef almost fainted and Dana suffered from a small panic attack. But in the end, it was an amazing show.  


After the show, we met the guys again and it was just really good to talk to these people. Also, Stef met Dustin from Starset and he put so much effort in writing down some lyrics for her, it was really great. And here's another shout out to Press to Meco for being so overly funny and kind (and thanks Adam for spilling your beer on my jacket). 
(12/16/18)

Shinedown Roadtrip: Hamburg



Kilometers traveled: 6.537

Shows: 8/10

Hamburg was incredible.

First of all, the whole day before the show was just very relaxed. We could sleep in, get ready and then head for the city. Then we also had pizza before the show. So we all felt good and relaxed before it all started.

 
Secondly, I met my dear friend Rike again. We hadn't seen each other in two years and I missed her so very much. I met Rike 2016 at the Shinedown show in Hamburg. It was her first show. We made it to the front row and had such an amazing time. We always said we would go to another Shinedown show together and that was the day. Also, I could give her a very personal present which made her so overly happy, I'm still close to crying because it made me so happy to see her so happy. She's just a wonderful person and I wish we could spend more time together. 


Then there was the show. I have seen Shinedown for 23 times now in total, and this show in Hamburg was the BEST SHINEDOWN SHOW EVER. Everything was perfect. The people who were there with me (Stef, Rike, Dana, April - thank you for being you) made me feel so very loved and happy. During some songs we just became one huge ball of love, hugging and holding each other. Then Stef had prepared 30 signs, 15 of them saying "You are heroes", 15 saying "You are loved". She had given them to people and we all held them up during "Get Up". Brent was so very touched by this, the whole band was, it was just beautiful. 

I still can't thank Shinedown enough for putting "Fly From the Inside" on the setlist for Stef. I've never seen her that happy, it was wonderful. And then there was this moment I still can't really believe was true. That moment when Brent and Zach played "What a Shame" for me. This song just means so much to me, it had been with me through very dark times and hearing it live was so beautiful, I'm crying while writing this. I know it was a tough request and it might not have been perfect to you, but it was perfect for me.

Yes, this show was very special. I was incredibly happy that night. And I am endlessly grateful for all of this. Still unreal. Forever one of the best moments I could experience. Thank you. I love you.
(12/17/18) 

Shinedown Roadtrip: Copenhagen 



Kilometers traveld: 6.871

Shows: 9/10

Before heading to Copenhagen, we had to say goodbye to Dana which was really sad. I can't wait to see her again.

Then we headed north. Our hostel in Copenhagen was really strange and the people we shared our room with were even worse (one guy watched us sleep which was creepy as hell). But the hostel crew was quite nice and when we prepared the signs for the show the guy working there put Shinedown on for us.

The show in Copenhagen was beautiful. We had made signs for all three bands and they all liked it. The one for Press to Meco said "The first band is really good", related to a thing they always did after the shows: They put up a phone and in the language of the country they were in they wrote down "The first band was really good" or "We need money for food". 

For Starset, we kept it rather simple yet very emotional: "You make everything okay." These are lyrics from their song "My Demons" which they always played as the last song of their set. Their photographer Brian included us holding up that sign in one of his videos - thanks again Brian!


The one we made for Shinedown said: "Shinedown is Family". It came straight from the heart because that was what Stef and I experienced on this Roadtrip. The band and crew included us in their family, but we also found family in the amazing other fans we met along the way. 

At this show, Shinedown played the most beautiful acoustic version of "Amaryllis" I ever heard. 

After the show, we had a really long and good talk with Adam of Starset. He was jsut really kind and open and funny and it was great to talk to him. Thank you again, also for the drumstick.  
(12/18/18)

Shinedown Roadtrip: Stockholm



Kilometers traveld: 8.844

Shows: 10/10

The last show. 


Our way to Stockholm was more difficult than expected as our train got cancelled and we had to improvise a bit. But we arrived anyway and checked in to our hostel which had some cringy people for us again. I'll never go to a hostel in Scandinavia again. 

It took us a really long walk to get to the venue and before we entered we had a coffee and tried to calm down a little. We were both very emotional and didn't feel too good. 

We went to the meet and greet again and it felt so good and so wrong at the same time, knowing this would be the last time meeting them for quite some time. Stef and I had prepared something for the band. We made them a book for which we asked several fans we had met due to Shinedown to answer some questions about them and send us pictures of them and the band. Thank you again Stine, Sissel, Lara, Michael, John, Rebecca, Rike, Dana, Rita and Gabrielle for being part of this. We love all of you and this roadtrip wouldn't have been the same without you.  

Photo: Sanjay Parikh

The show was super emotional. I can't ven really think back to it. All I know is it was beautiful.

When we said goodbye afterwards, the whole crew was just so amazingly kind and nice and lovely. Thank you for all the love you gave us. Really. 

I said everything else. You can check it out in my recap of this whole roadtrip.

Now I'm back home. And I wonder how this was my life. How this is my life. I am so thankful. And I miss all these people so much. But it's never goodbye - it's just till next time. 

 (12/19/18)

10 Shows - Shinedown is Family


Photo: Sanjay Parikh

I always had a problem believing people when they said "Dreams do come true" because this mostly comes from those who already reached their goals, who seem to be far away from where I am at right now. However, this past month taught me that they were right and that I was wrong. Dreams do come true. In fact, Stef and I were living the dream. The life we wanted to live. 


When we went to those Shinedown shows in June, I already thought that this was it - it wouldn't get any better or closer. That night in Groningen seemed to be the top of what I could ever get. Again, I was wrong.


We started out with this crazy idea: "Let's do 10 shows all over Europe on this tour." So we bought tickets, we planned our travels, we planned our stays at different cities. People kept telling me that was insane. I didn't care. I had the chance to do this, I wouldn't let that slip away. 


The first show in Manchester seems ages ago now. No idea why, but I was actually really nervous before. It had only been three months since I had last seen Shinedown, but it felt different. With every show we did, this Shinedown Roadtrip evolved into what might have been the most wonderful, most insane and all in all best time I ever had. Each show was better than the one before, each travel had me more excited. I had gone through every possible emotion on this trip. I met so many wonderful people, saw beautiful places and I still can't really cope with everything that happened to me. 

Photo: Sanjay Parikh
This has been so special and precious and now that it has come to an end, I don't really know what all of this is about now. I don't understand how these last weeks could actually be my life. I don't know how this could be or why I deserve this, but I am very very grateful for every second of it. I'd never imagined something like this to be possible for me - but this has been my reality and I still feel so very priviledged that I could live this dream for a month now. I'm circling around this, sorry.


This Shinedown Roadtrip showed me that Shinedown really is family. Shinedown and their crew. I am about to say a few words about some of the people who made this whole experience so very special and I know that I repeat myself in this. I just want to somehow express how grateful I am, but no words are strong enough to describe how I feel. 

Whatever.


Adam, Lewis and Luke of Press to Meco: You went up on stage every night and put on a great show, no matter if the audience is into it or not. You are amazing people and seeing you all these times made me overly happy. I was looking forward to your set all the time and think you are very talented. Thank you for being the kindest and funniest people. I'll see you in Germany next time. 

Brian, Adam and everyone else in and around Starset: What you put on when you are on stage is insane. You have definitely won a new fan in me and I'll sure come back to see you headlining a show. Thank you for all the times you put a camera right in my face, Brian. Hope you could get some great shots of Stef and me losing it. Thank you for not killing me with the drumstick, Adam. And in general for being such great people. 


John, Hoogie, Sparky, Primo and everyone else in the Shinedown Crew: Thank you for everything you do at the shows. Thank you for making all of this possible. Thank you for taking care of us. With you I always felt safe and very welcome. Thank you for being so nice to us even though we were just standing in the way sometimes. Thank you for talking to us and sharing your stories with us. Thank you for throwing picks at our heads, for photobombing our pictures and for all the fun we had with you guys and girls. You are the real heroes and we appreciate and love you for what you do and who you are. Thank you for making us feel like we belong to your family. It means so much.


Sanjay: I hope you know how wonderful you are. Your pictures are amazing and your work is inspiring. Because of you I actually really want to try for the application for photography studies next year. You are always so sweet and kind to us and I really don't know how to thank you for all of this. The world needs more people like you, really. Thank you for being in my life now.


Matt: You know all of this already. You're family, you really are. And I really hope you're alright and that things play out the way you want them to. You helped me more than you might know and I can't imagine going through life without you anymore. Thank you for making me feel loved, safe, and wanted. You deserve nothing but the best. My world is better now because of you. I love you much.


Zach: When I was feeling down in 2016, you were the one to actually made me feel like I wasn't invisible to the world, like people did care about me. This year, you showed me all of this again because I forgot about it. Thank you for doing this, for being over here even though it's hard for you. The rest is in the letters. Thank you, so much, for everything.


Barry: Your positivity is so contagious that I really wish you were around more often. Thank you for taking care of Stef and me, especially her. Thank you for all the fun, the laughter and funny faces. You are a legend. 


Eric: Your strength helps other people to get through their darkness and this is something overly important. You are inspiring to many and I am grateful to know you. Your talent is insane and I believe there's not one thing on earth you wouldn't be brilliant at. Thank you for appreciating us so much, for always showing some love, even when you're not feeling well. Thank you, really.


Brent: I have no idea how I deserve to know someone like you, to have you in my life. You did so much for Stef and me during these last weeks and you did so much for me earlier this year already. I just want to give something back to you and I hope there will be a way that I can make up for all of this one day. I could write another letter about all of these things, so I'll try to keep it short. Thank you for everything, always. It means the world to me. I love you. 


Stef: ... I can't believe it's not even a year that we know each other because it feels like you've been with me all my life. And I wish I met you earlier, before you had to go through all you've been through. I wish I could've been there to tell you that: YOU ARE LOVED. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. YOU ARE NEEDED. You understand me like no other and I am so happy and grateful we could do this together. I hope you know how much you deserve to be happy. I love you. And you will always have a place here. Never forget how important you are, to me, to many others, to the world. 


...

Thank you to everyone who made this possible for me, to my family and friends who were cheering for this even more than I did sometimes, to the wonderful people I met along the way. I love you. Thank you.

It's never goodbye. It's just 'till next time.  
(12/01/18) 

In Memory - 23 Shinedown concerts


As some of you might already know from my Instagram, I’m going to do the second season of the Shinedown Roadtrip – in the USA! I’ve never been to the States before and so I’m super excited to go there, but also a little nervous. Another thing is that I won’t have my Shinedown travel partner Stef with me due to circumstances. So there has to be a third season of Shinedown Roadtrip which we can do together again.

Happily, I’ll have Dana by my side for the eight shows I’ll go to in the U.S. She’s an amazing person and I couldn’t imagine anyone else stepping in for Stef at this point (although the three of us together would’ve been even more awesome). 

Back to the point. Now that I’ll see Shinedown in their home country for the first time, I thought I could look back at the 23 shows I’ve been to so far. So here’s a trip down memory lane.


Show 1: 5th February 2012, Live Music Hall, Cologne

Rock show partners: my dad, my brother, my uncle and my friend Janis

Support: Liberty Lies      Special guest: Halestorm

I started late with rock shows in my life, so my first Shinedown concert was probably my sixth concert in general. We stood somewhere in the middle of everything, still I could see the musicians who had just become my favorite band very clearly. “Amaryllis” hadn’t been released yet, but they played three songs of it (“Bully”, “Enemies” & “Adrenaline”). Also, German TV was there and so I happen to still have a video of my first Shinedown concert.


Show 2: 20th October 2012, E-Werk, Cologne

Rock show partners: my dad, my brother, my aunt and my uncle

Support/Special guest: Red Light King

Yup, Shinedown did two headline tours in Europe in 2012. Amazing, I know. So of course I went there again. They offered a CD signing if you bought “Amaryllis” at the show, so I did even though of course I already had the album at home. But I really wanted to meet the band. And so I did. After the show, their former head of security Jake led us to a balcony where we waited for the band. I wore a self-designed t-shirt that night and Jake complimented me on it and we had a little chat about it. Honestly, I was so freaking nervous I couldn’t really say anything clever or profound, just tried not to make a fool of myself. The band came through, Eric and Barry from one side, Zach and Brent from the other. I think Zach was the first of them who reached me. We had just a short talk, but he was so nice and I was so happy. Then Brent came over and as he saw my shirt, he insisted to sign it (fyi we were told that we could ONLY let the CD be signed, NOTHING ELSE, so yeah, that was kinda cool). Brent hugged me and I gave him a letter I wrote for them and the first page of the novel I wrote (about their album “Amaryllis”). Then Eric came and gave me a high five for the shirt. And then Barry came and greeted me with the words “It’s good to finally meet you in person” (We had a few very small conversations via Twitter before and I never expected him to know who I was). Oh, and did I mention they were the first band I ever met in person? Crazy start. I recall being the happiest girl on earth after this. So yeah, thank you again guys for showing me that I belong somewhere. I was just a school girl then, not really belonging somewhere, not entirely sure of who I actually was. Meeting Shinedown that night was really special to me. (Btw they even tweeted me a thank you for the letter later without me mentioning it again. Just gotta love these guys.)


Show 3: 27th October 2012, O2 Academy Brixton, London 

Rock show partners: my friends Annika, Vanessa and Julia

Support/Special guest: Red Light King

I was a lucky girl in 2012. One week after the show in Cologne, Shinedown played in London – and I just happened to be there on a school trip. As my teacher was super cool (thank you again, Mrs. Berge) I was allowed to go to the show if I would bring at least two friends. So I went to see Shinedown again, this time with all pyro and lasers. And yes, I bought “Amaryllis” again to get to the signing after the show. The show was really awesome and we came quite close to the stage (which was something new for me at that time) and then we all went to the signing because we all had bought CDs. Brent and Jake both were sick that night, so the talk was rather short, but Zach hugged me and recognized me and Barry and Eric were both so very nice and caring. It was just perfect for me. 


Show 4: 4th February 2016, Carnival of Madness at the Wembley Arena, London

Rock show partners: my dad, my brother and three people I met at the show

Line-Up: Highly Suspect, Halestorm, Shinedown, Black Stone Cherry

Yeah, it took Shinedown four years to come back to Europe somehow. And now, there was no such thing as a full headline tour. But it didn’t matter. My mom and dad gave my brother and me the tickets for this festival and we traveled to London together. We waited for hours before the arena, but this led to us heading to the front row, right in the center. First on was Highly Suspect who were nice but I can’t really remember their set. Then next up Halestorm, my second favorite band who I only got to know because of that first Shinedow show in 2012. And then there was Shinedown. They had the best set and a drumset twice as big as the other ones. They stared of with “Black Cadillac” which I found super awesome because they didn’t choose to hit us with their heaviest track just to prove that they are a tough rock band. No need for that. I totally freaked out during the show because it was so beautiful. Black Stone Cherry just couldn’t stand up to that in my opinion and I almost passed out then because all the adrenaline was gone and I felt that I had stood for hours and hadn’t eaten enough. So I went to the back and watched the rest of the show there.


Show 5: 3rd June 2016, Rock am Ring, Germany

Rock show partners: my friends Inga and Anna

Line-Up: messed up but I guess Architects were before Shinedown

I hated Rock am Ring 2016. Everything was messed up, my friends were put into danger, the bands I wanted to see didn’t get to play and the people who were there with us were not my favorites. Shinedown already had a shitty time slot, 00:30 Friday night. But due to the first thunder storm, they started two hours later. I had made a sign as Zach’s son had been born that year and I wanted to congratulate him (this sign was the only thing about me that was still dry that night because it had been raining like hell almost all day). So one side of the sign said “Congrats Zach #babyspacejam” and the other one said “We were asking for it” as “Asking for it” was my favorite Shinedown song at that time. So I stood in the front row, Zach’s side, and Shinedown came on stage. I somehow just knew they would start with it. So they did. “Asking for it” was their first song and as I held up my sign Eric had to laugh. During “Simple Man”, I held up the side I made for Zach. I think he said thank you at least ten times that night. I was so happy that he liked it, I couldn’t stop smiling. In the end, he came to my side of the stage and threw his wristband in my direction, but the girl next to me grabbed it, too, and took it from me. I know it’s just a piece of clothing but that somehow ruined the night for me. Anyway, I texted Zach via Instagram and thanked him for throwing it anyway. I also told him I’d be at the show in Hamburg and he said he’d take care of me then. Just another proof that Zach Myers is a wonderful person if you ask me.


Show 6: 7th June 2016, Markthalle, Hamburg

Rock show partners: my dad and my friend Rike (who I met there)

Support: none, just Shinedown

So my dad and I drove to Hamburg for the Shinedown show. At the entrance I met a girl who was there alone, so I joined her. Her name’s Rike and she’s amazing. Just fyi. Back to the story. We went inside and cut to the front row, Zach’s side again. I had brought my sign one more time so he would recognize me. Looking back, I’m not sure I needed it, but his smile during the show was rewarding enough. I got three guitar picks from him and Sparky that night and Sparky also took a picture of me with the sign which is still up on Zach’s Instagram account. He even tagged me in it. That night they played “Through the Ghost” live and I was crying like a baby. Also, Zach played a cover of “Don’t look back in Anger” by Oasis which led to the song being stuck in my head for years (which eventually resulted in my best friend and me getting the lyrics tattooed). Outside of the venue I found a setlist and asked the crew if I could take it. In the car I realized it was from Rock am Ring. That was my first Shinedown setlist I ever got.


Show 7: 14th June 2016, Melkweg, Amsterdam

Rock show partners: my brother, my friend Christina and Rita (who I met there)

Support: Mandrake’s Monster

One week after the show in Hamburg, my brother and I went to Amsterdam to see Shinedown (again). We spent a really beautiful day in the city, meeting up with a good friend of mine and meeting another friend I hadn’t seen in a while at the show. We made it to the front again, standing on Eric’s side this time. Looking back now I guess the band recognized me. But I’m not entirely sure. I only know Zach did recognize me. Barry threw me a drumstick, but my brother caught it. Which is fine because he’s a big fan of Barry and I was happy for him. After the show, the band came out quickly. I finally got to talk to Zach and take pictures with him. It was just so super nice and I was happy. The others were kind and nice, too, of course. We took some really funny pictures (and the one with Brent which is actually the only picture with a musician that I think I look good in). I don’t know, it just felt good to talk to each one of them and especially Zach was taking care of me that summer. He made me feel loved and appreciated much and I really needed that back then. I was facing some major changes in my life and I had no idea how to deal with all of this. Brent, too, helped me through some things, even though he probably wasn’t really feeling well that night. I’m still so very thankful for these moments.


Show 8: 15th June 2016, Doornroosje, Nijmegen

Rock show partners: my brother, my friends Inga and Kira, Jana and Erik, Gabrielle (who I met there)

Support: Mandrake’s Monster

We drove to Nijmegen the next day for another Shinedown show. And it was just amazing. We stood front row, Zach’s side and he played “Don’t look back in Anger” again. Also, the whole band seemed so relaxed and they had so much fun on stage, it was wonderful to watch. This time, I caught the drumstick Barry threw for me (only after it hit my head though). Afterwards, we waited outside, but there was a big closed door and the band didn’t see us waiting. I texted Zach that we were outside, so he and Barry came out. It was good to see them again before they left because I knew that was my last Shinedown show for some time again. 


Show 9: 29th April 2017, Festhalle, Frankfurt

Rock show partners: none

Special guest: Shinedown, opening for Iron Maiden

Even though I tend to forget I went to this show, it was probably one of the most important ones for me. It was a Saturday during the year I lived in Würzburg and I was in the middle of a dark time. My best friend Svenja and I went to the zoo in Nürnberg and I was talking about that show being in Frankfurt that night. She encouraged me to go, so I did. I drove to Frankfurt that evening without having a ticket for this SOLD OUT show. Plus I’m not into Iron Maiden at all. I just wanted to see Shinedown. I was fifteen minutes late because I couldn’t find a parking spot and I bought a leftover ticket from someone in front of the venue, then rushed inside. They had already started playing and I came in during “How did you love”. I found a spot in the third row, Zach’s side, and as soon as I stood there I couldn’t help but cry, ending up sobbing because it felt so good to be there. I had 45 minutes of Shinedown for 80 euros and I am so happy I did this. It felt so good. Zach found me in the crowd and waved at me, threw me a guitar pick. It feels quite unreal, but that’s what it was.


Show 10: 3rd June 2018, Rock im Park, Germany

Rock show partners: Stef (but we weren’t standing together)

Line-Up: Black Stone Cherry was up before Shinedown

I didn’t even realize this was my 10th time seeing Shinedown before after it had ended. This was the first time Zach wasn’t around because he and his wife were expecting their second child. Josh Sturm had stepped in for him and he was awesome. Also, I was so excited to hear songs from “Attention Attention” live. And what can I say? Shinedown killed it again. 


Show 11: 20th June 2018, De Oosterpoort, Groningen

Rock show partners: Stef
 
Support: Ego Kill Talent

That day, I didn’t even want to go to the show. I didn’t want anything at all. I was feeling so lonely and lost and like nothing would ever turn out right. It was bad. But I went to the show which happened to be the most important Shinedown show for me. The show itself was pretty emotional – especially when Brent talked to the audience before they played “Brilliant”. It was super touching and soon I found myself sobbing again. I had also brought a sign again which said “You help me get up and get a move on” which is still so very true. Eric and Barry definitely saw it and Eric gave me a setlist in the end. After the show, we didn’t find the bus so everybody left, including Stef. I drove out of the parking garage and had to turn. That’s when I found the bus. After ten minutes of waiting, Matt came to me (that’s the first time we met) and he sent out the whole band. Brent was the last one and when he came over I told him my name and he went “Oh shit, I don’t have my glasses on. I didn’t recognize you.” Then we had our talk. It was important and it felt very real to me. I drove back home, sobbing, sending my friends a voice mail because I had to tell someone about this. Brent helped me to get out of the dark. He didn’t pull me out, he made me strong to do this myself. I am still grateful for this.


Show 12: 21st June 2018, Melkweg, Amsterdam

Rock show partners: my dad and Stef

Support: Ego Kill Talent

Amsterdam was emotional. Stef and I made it to the front row and we thought we were prepared for Brent’s speech before “Brilliant”. I wasn’t expecting him to cite from my letter which I gave him the night before. So I ended up sobbing again. The show was beautiful. I had another sign with me, one side saying “It’s our day to be brilliant”, the other saying: “Thank you for everything”. The band saw it and they smiled a lot. I did, too. After the show, we shortly talked and when Brent came over I started crying. I really didn’t mean to and I think he was a little helpless about it. However, that’s the way it was. 


Show 13: 22nd June 2018, Graspop Metal Meeting, Belgium

Rock show partners: none

Line-Up: Tremonti came after Shinedown

After I asked one of the Iron Maiden fans in the front row if I could stand in front of them for Shinedown and they really let me, I was ready for the last Shinedown show of the summer. Even though the band was super tired, they brought one hell of a show up on stage. Matt came around to give me some guitar picks and it was just fun. I was happy. After the show, I went to the signing and Eric, Barry and Brent were awesome as always. I was a little sad I couldn’t say goodbye to Josh, but I understand he didn’t want the action in there. 


Show 14: 31st October 2018, Manchester Academy, Manchester

Rock show partners: Stef

Support: Press to Meco                Special guest: Starset

Full article here.


Show 15: 7th November 2018, O2 Academy Brixton, London

Rock show partners: Stef, Lara, Stine, Sissel, Debs

Support: Press to Meco                Special guest: Starset

Full article here.


Show 16: 11th November 2018, Live Music Hall, Cologne

Rock show partners: my brother, my dad, Inga, Anna, Stef and April

Support: Press to Meco                Special guest: Starset

Full article here.


Show 17: 12th November 2018, 013 Poppodium, Tilburg

Rock show partners: Stef, Rita, Gabrielle

Support: Press to Meco                Special guest: Starset

Full article here.


Show 18: 13th November 2018, Batschkapp, Frankfurt

Rock show partners: Stef, Caro

Support: Press to Meco                Special guest: Starset

Full article here.

Photo: Sanjay Parikh

Show 19: 16th November 2018, TRIX, Antwerp

Rock show partners: Stef, Cliff

Support: Press to Meco                Special guest: Starset

Full article here.


Show 20: 23rd November 2018, LKA Longhorn, Stuttgart

Rock show partners: Stef, Dana, Melle

Support: Press to Meco                Special guest: Starset

Full article here.


Show 21: 25th November 2018, Docks, Hamburg

Rock show partners: Stef, Dana, Rike, April

Support: Press to Meco                Special guest: Starset

Full article here.

Photo: Sanjay Parikh

Show 22: 27th November 2018, Vega, Copenhagen

Rock show partners: Stef, Stine, Sissel

Support: Press to Meco                Special guest: Starset

Full article here.


Show 23: 29th November 2018, Annexet, Stockholm

Rock show partners: Stef

Support: Press to Meco                Special guest: Starset

Full article here.

(04/23/19)

Living the Dream – Shinedown Roadtrip USA

photo: Sanjay Parikh
I came home this week, still trying to process all that has happened during the past three weeks. I was looking forward to my trip to the US, sure, but I never expected any of these things that eventually happened. When Stef and I went on our first Shinedown Roadtrip in November ’18 I thought it couldn’t get any better. Turned out I was wrong.
I went to eight shows across the South in the US; it was my first time ever traveling outside of Europe. Dana joined me for this adventure, planning our stays and our routes and everything I couldn’t do because I was so occupied with my bachelor thesis before I flew over. (Thank you so much, again, for doing all of this for me, Dana.)
Everything was perfect.

 
Show 1/8: Memphis, Tennessee

We started in Atlanta because it was cheap and easy for me to fly there. Dana picked me up on May 1st and we drove to Memphis where we would attend the first of eight shows for me. Memphis was amazing. I loved exploring Beale Street and finding all the small hints to Zach Myers’ beginnings there. I loved having dinner at Sushi Jimmy because Matt Healy recommended it to us – and it was literally the best sushi I ever had. And I loved seeing everyone again.
Beale Street Music Festival was the first show. A festival is never as personal, but it was very different compared to Europe. Shinedown were headlining – that’s something you never experience over here. And the show was the perfect warm up. Seeing Matt and Sanjay was wonderful. And the show brought me back to my happy me which I had been looking for for several months.


Show 2/8: New Orleans, Louisiana

We drove on to New Orleans for the first real headline show. NOLA as a city had me from the first moment. It’s simply special and worth seeing. The vegetation was fascinating, the city was full of life and the food was interesting (we had alligator e.g.).
The first show – first real show – warmed my heart from deep within. Seeing the band again, speaking to them after half a year was necessary and beautiful. I felt so very welcome when they came to greet me (especially Barry and Eric who would come and say hi before even starting with the Meet & Greet). And the show was incredibly special: I heard so many songs I never heard live before (e.g. I Dare You) and they played for two hours straight.
The crew was just as welcoming. Especially Hoogie and Sparky took good care of me (besides Matt and Sanjay of course). 


Show 3/8: Atlanta, Georgia I

We drove back to Atlanta the next day, heading straight to the venue for the next show. This one was very special for me because I got to shoot the show with Sanjay. It was something I have been dreaming of for quite some time, as a person and as a photographer. And that dream came true. Sanjay showed me many things, helping me to get great shots. He’s one of the kindest and most wonderful people I know and deserves all the good in this world.
Shooting the show was amazing. I’d do it again every time.


Show 4/8: Atlanta, Georgia II

And they let me shoot the second show, too. This night was even more special, even though everybody seemed pretty stressed out that day. It wasn’t about me at all, but it somehow got to me and I suffered from a major emotional breakdown that night, without any specific or visible reason. But I wanted to be professional and just take some great pictures, and I think I succeeded. That night was mostly acoustic and that was just beautiful. Hearing Burning Bright and Lost in the Crowd live was incredible. And Eric, Barry and Brent made eye contact with me and my camera so I could get some amazing pictures. So yeah, the night was pretty perfect and that emotional low was weird, but it eventually passed when I went to sleep.



Show 5/8: Myrtle Beach, South Carolina I

For me, the Myrtle Beach shows were the best ones on this run. That was mainly because of all the love that’s been shared and the beautiful atmosphere. During the first night Meet & Greet I met Elizabeth Blake and her father Andy. It was her first time meeting the band and I can’t really explain why – maybe because she reminded me of myself – but I really wanted this night to be extraordinary special for this girl and her dad. I gave her my spare ticket for the second night and she was so extremely grateful and happy, just thinking about it makes me smile again.
The band also realized that these people were special and they made their Meet & Greet even better, giving her drumsticks and picks and showing them how much they appreciate them. Dana and I could keep a spot for Elizabeth in the front row and when Shinedown played “Monsters”, Brent made eye contact with her throughout the whole last chorus. It was beautiful. And I am so grateful that I met these people because they brightened my night and my life with their presence, gratitude and love for each other.


Show 6/8: Myrtle Beach, South Carolina II

The second night in Myrtle Beach was even better because the set was different. Luckily, Elizabeth’s dad could get a ticket, too, so both of them were able to join us during this show. I want to give a shout out to Joshua from the House of Blues crew at this point who was taking care of us all the time and who was the nicest person these two days (willing to take care of the girl in case her dad couldn’t make it to the show).
The set was mostly acoustic again, including “In Memory” which meant a lot to me. They also played “Shed Some Light” and got Steve up on stage to play bass with them, which was very unique. I had also brought a sign which said “You bring people together” that Elizabeth and I held up during “How Did You Love” (which led to Brent messing up the lyrics – sorry again). This night was magical, full of love. It reminded me of how grateful I am for this life and these people and for the fact that I could make a 16-year-old girl happy and be with her while she had the time of her life. Thank you so much, to everyone involved, for helping me to get to this point, for making all of this possible.


Show 7/8: Nashville, Tennessee I

The first Nashville show was weird for me. The Ryman, the venue they played, is pretty special and I know how much it meant to the band that they could play this historical place. Maybe I was in a weird mood. Maybe it was because I think a seated rockshow is weird. I’m not sure, but this felt strange and I cried through most of the songs. But the love was still real and especially the crew was fantastic that night. They knew how to lighten up the mood and make me feel better. And seeing the band so extremely happy and blessed was worth it all.



Show 8/8: Nashville, Tennessee II

This was my last show and it couldn’t have been any better. During Meet & Greet, the band was extremely lovely. Especially Eric and Brent made me feel so appreciated and welcome. We watched the show from a very special spot that night (thank you again, Hoogie) and I was the happiest girl on earth throughout the two and a half hours they played. 

I wouldn’t want to miss any of this; not Brent asking me to dance with him in Meet & Greet or screaming in my ear mid-show (I’ll miss you, too and yes, now I’m a little sad); not Zach waving me goodbye and running back to give me a hug because I would fly back home; not Barry making sure I had a good time and including us in the talk with his friends; not Eric sending a video to Stef and showing me some interesting things on his phone before he even showered after the show; not Matt taking care of me all the time and being the best person as always; not Sanjay giving me so much love and teaching me all these things; not John making sure I’m alright and safe and being funny and wird and letting me be around; not Sparky saying sorry to me whenever I see him; not Hoogie explaining all the names of Eric’s bass guitars to me and being the kindest person on earth; not the rest of the crew letting me be there and accepting me the way I am; not Dana being the best and funniest travel partner and friend; not Helena welcoming me in her home and being my friend without even knowing me before.

This Shinedown Roadtrip gave me so much more than I could ever wish for. I am grateful. So grateful. And I love these people so very much. Thank you, for everything, always.
Till next time.
(05/25/19)

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