I've been thinking about love and relationships a lot lately. I've been single for five years now and I really got to admit: I like this.
When reading my older stories and reflecting on how I thought of love and what a perfect relationship must look like, I was trapped in old and conservative views when I was a teenager. I thought I needed to marry and have kids just to fulfill the relationship - the ultimate proof of love, right?
Don't get me wrong, if you really want this, if this is your dream, then go for it! I'm not judging this. I just think many people out there don't even think about if they really want this for their life. It's just how life goes for most.
When I'm with my friends, some of them tend to bring up this topic again and again, also asking me about getting a boyfriend and why I didn't bring anybody home in quite a long time.
Let me tell you this: I don't want to. I don't know anybody I'd want to spend this phase of my life with yet. And that's perfectly fine for me. I love being independent. I love having time for myself.
I also love a good love story. That's something I realized, too. Give me dramatic and wild love story, I'm completely up for that. Just read the Black Dagger Brotherhood series by J. R. Ward and you'll know what I mean. I also love writing this kind of stuff. I don't know, it's something I enjoy (just as much as writing fighting scenes btw.). It's easy to connect to it because we all felt something like this, experienced stuff that had to do with love and attraction and that went crazy. Life basically is a daily soap. But there's no room for something like this in my own life right now. And people need to accept that.
We don't necessarily need a relationship to find fullfillment. We can be happy on our own. With our family. Our friends. A band we love. Traveling. Our pets. This can be enough. And people need to stop asking us why we're single. Because the answer is easy: Because we want to.
And as much as I'd love to say this is something that only happens to women - people asking why they're not married yet because, yes, we are still living in the 60s - it's not like that. The same happens to my brother all the time. So we should just focus on what makes us happy. It could be very different from what makes other people happy. Always keep that in mind.